yes = no

no = yes

maybe = no

I'm sorry = You'll be sorry

We need = I want

It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now.

Sure... go ahead. = Don't you even dare!!

I'm not upset. = Of course I'm upset you moron!!!

You're so... manly. = You need a shave and you sweat a lot

You're certainly attentive tonight. = Is sex all you ever think about?

Be romantic, turn out the lights. = I have flabby thights.

This kitchen is so inconvenient. = I want a new house.

I want new curtains. = and carpeting and furniture and wallpaper

Do you love me? = I'm gonna ask for something expensive

How much do you love me ? = I did sth today you're really not gonna like.

I'll be ready in a minute. = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV.

You have to learn to communicate. = Just agree with me.

Are you listening to me?!! = [ too late, you're dead]

I'm not yelling = Yes, I'm yelling because i think it's important !!

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